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Self-confidence is a capability that can be developed over time. Learning how to build self-confidence is a process of expanding the areas of your life that you feel confident about and uncovering the beliefs that lower self-esteem to understand why you feel that way.

Building  confidence habits requires you to build a strong sense of self-esteem and develop the good habits that build your self-confidence while also learning to be aware of the areas of your life where you wish to improve.

If you want to be more confident, you need to continually protect your self-confidence.  Feelings of self-confidence can drop over time if you experience bouts of low self-esteem, setbacks or failures.

To learn how to build confidence and self-esteem it’s important to understand that confidence is a skill that can be learnt and developed.  If you’re experiencing low self-esteem right now, it’s important to understand that you can make changes to gain self-confidence and expand your existing confidence levels.

Being confident can help you feel happier, more motivated and reach your goals quicker.  Confidence comes from understanding your strengths and spending more time using them.

In this article I’ll share 11 tips for building self-confidence tips that you can use to be more confident and feel more self-assured.

Read also: 10 essential self-confidence tips 

What is self-confidence?

Self-confidence is having the commitment and courage to believe in yourself.  Being confident means having an inner self-confidence to move confidently towards your goals and be able to handle any setbacks or challenges.

You will be more confident when you value yourself, despite what others may say.

Self-confidence is about feeling good about yourself and feeling worthy all the time, despite any imperfections or failures.  Being confident allows you to appreciate yourself more and have gratitude for what you have.

Why is self-confidence important?

Why is confidence important?  Confidence is important because building self-confidence makes your trust yourself more, feel better about yourself, stop comparing yourself to others and amplifies your feelings of self-worth.

Confidence attracts confidence.  If you are confident, people gravitate towards you as confidence makes everyone feel good and happier about themselves.

Learning how to build self-confidence is a capability that can be developed over time.  There is a thought that some people have self-confidence and others don’t.

This is not true.  If someone seems to have self-confidence, it’s because they’ve spent time building their confidence.

Self-confidence comes from developing capabilities and skills, focusing time and energy on strengths and staying true to the things that are important to them.

How to build self-confidence

Here are 11 tips for building self-confidence.

1. Build self-confidence through goal setting

It’s easy to lose confidence if you don’t have specific, measurable goals to work towards each day.  Being confident means being clear on what is important to you.  Goals help you recognise what you’re good at and help you build self-confidence by making positive progress towards your goals.

Once you have clear goals written down, work backwards from that longer goals to define the process and actions steps needed to accomplish the goals.

Use 90-day goals setting techniques, supported by monthly and weekly action plans to help you stay motivated and confident

Read my guide on how to set and achieve goals.

2. Talk yourself up

Building self-confidence is about feeling better and more positive about yourself.  Be more confident by talking yourself up each day.  Being confident helps you focus on the positive progress you’re making towards your goals.

Highly confident people start and end each day by focusing on something positive in their lives.  Confidence grows when you focus on being confident.

Be more confident by stating or writing down an achievement or win you had.  Increase confidence by making a commitment to achieve something important to you.

The process of starting and ending the day on a positive note, helps you be kind to yourself and builds your self-confidence.  When you feel like you’re achieving, your confidence grows.

3. Plan your day effectively

Be more confident by focusing on things you’re good at.  Building self-confidence starts with identifying the things you want to achieve each day, and then having a plan to achieve it.

To boost your self-esteem, plan your day so you always feel like you’re winning.

When you fail to complete your to-do list, confidence can drop.

To be more confident every day, simplify your to-do list to your most important activities so you can achieve every day.

To build up your confidence, think about how you would feel if you could achieve your most important results each week. Get clear on how achievements will build self-confidence.

Read my guide to effective weekly planning.

4. Create positive daily habits

Confidence can grow when you build positive daily habits.  If your goals are important to you, then making progress every day needs to become a constant in your life.

Learn how to build self-confidence by having the willingness and perseverance to show up every day and work towards those goals.

Schedule time every day to work towards achieving those goals.

This will help you stay accountable towards achieving those goals and give you a framework to take action.

5. Don’t compare yourself to others

Comparison is a self-confidence killer.

If you want to learn how to build confidence, start by stopping comparing yourself to others.

The purpose of being confident is to put your mind into a productive mindset so you can see the possibilities and opportunities around you.

Comparing your situation or your level of success to others, or to an ideal, can create a scarcity mindset.

It may cause you to question your own ability, which lowers self-confidence.

To start being confident, focus on yourself and celebrate your own unique success and capabilities every day.

When you learn how to build self-confidence, and always have it as a capability, what others are doing won’t matter so much.  If you’re struggling with FOMO, learn how to overcome fear of missing out.

6. Set yourself up for achievement

People lose confidence because they set themselves goals that are too difficult to achieve.  In many cases it is not the goal that’s the problem, it is the deadline.

If you want to build self-confidence, start by setting goals that you can achieve.

You can do this in two ways.

Have big, scary goals but give yourself longer to achieve that goal in.

Rather than set a big goal and only give yourself 30 days to achieve the goal in, extend the deadline to 90 days.

Another method is to set a small number of short-term goals that you feel confident about achieving.

Once you build up a series of goal wins, you’ll feel much more confident about yourself.

7. Focus on value creation

To be more confident, shift your focus from yourself to others.  Build your self-confidence by helping others achieve their goals.

By focusing on creating value and helping others, your confidence will grow.  You’ll feel great about yourself and will feel grateful about the skills you used to help those people.

Your confidence will grow when you can make a difference in the life of someone that is important to you.

8. Recognise what you’re good at

Highly confident people focus on their strengths.  Many people develop low self-esteem when they think about or have their weaknesses pointed out to them.

Instead of focusing on fixing your weaknesses, start building self-confidence by identifying and multiplying the unique strengths you have.

You’ll build your self-confidence much quicker if you spend more time doing activities you love to do and are great at.

This self-confidence will multiply further if you do it for people who really value you and your contribution to their business and life.

9. Be kind to yourself

It’s hard to feel good about yourself and self-confident if you don’t feel good about yourself and have low energy.

Highly confident people are kind to themselves and develop the habits that build self-confidence.  To build self-confidence, make time to sleep better, get regular exercise and improve your eating habits.

Build self-esteem by developing an abundance mindset, journaling and expressing gratitude daily.

It’s important to build self-confidence physically, mentally and spiritually.

Build your self-confidence by making the effort to look after the things that are most important to you.

Read also: 7 ways to develop an abundance mindset 

10. Overcome obstacles to build self-confidence

Many people run away from obstacles because they’re fearful or simply don’t know how to overcome the obstacle.

Learn to love obstacles because it is the overcoming of important obstacles that can create the biggest breakthroughs.

When you set bigger and better goals, your brain will automatically come up with obstacles.

Look at each obstacle individually and write down one specific action you can take to overcome the obstacle.

Then take action.

By overcoming obstacles, and building capabilities, your self-confidence will build and build.

11. Work with a coach or mentor

To build your self-confidence it’s important to surround yourself with people who raise your self-esteem.  Working with a coach or mentor will help you be more confident by ensuring you focus on the things you’re good at and ensure you always talk yourself up.

Working with a business coach will give you greater clarity, direction and more confidence.

A coach will believe in you, support you and create a safe space to discuss problems and challenges.  This will help you be more confident in yourself.

Having someone to help you set goals and ensure you focus on what you’ve achieved will ensure you don’t lose confidence and self-esteem.

When things get rough, having an accountability structure will ensure you always stay confident and have a clear path to follow

Self-confidence always grows by having clarity around the next step you should take.

Read also: 6 benefits of accountability coaching.

 Summing Up

Learning how to build self-confidence can take time but your confidence can build every day if you follow the tips laid out in this article.  These tips for building self-confidence will help you set better goals, focus on your strengths, talk yourself up and be kinder to yourself.

Pick one or two that resonate with you and take action every day to boost your self-confidence.

This article is part of my “Building Confidence” series. Links to other articles in this series below:

3 simple ways to increase confidence every day

4 simple ways to be more confident 

How to be more confident: 10 self-confidence tips 

13 powerful ways to boost self-confidence 

About the Author

Mark Pettit is a time management coach based in Colchester, Essex, UK.  He is the Founder of time management coaching company Lucemi Consulting.

Mark provides time management coaching programs and accountability coaching programs to entrepreneurs and leaders in London, Essex, Suffolk, East Anglia and across the UK, US and Canada.

Get more articles, tips and tools to help you build self-confidence on the blog.

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